I had big plans for this week.
Plans to blog about some pretty important things that had come up in my life recently.
Plans to hold true to my "blogging three times a week" promise.
But then IT happened.
The Big Sick 2011.
I have been incapacitated since Sunday night, unable to breathe due to the amount of crud clogging up my pipes. It was impossible for me to sleep due to the fact any prone position would make me gag and choke and feel like I was drowning. Not a fun sensation. I can absolutely cross off downing as preferred ways to die. Due to the inability to sleep issue I was unable to work on Monday and then spent the entirety of my weekend dragging myself between the couch and the bed, trying to find a position that was moderately comfortable enough for me to get some rest while alternately attempting to cough up or throw up whatever was clogging my throat. I missed work, I missed time doing valuable errands, I missed time spent with my husband but most upsetting, I missed my MIL's birthday. Thankfully I convinced Charming to leave me on my death bed and go take his mother out for some fun so I didn't ruin everything.
The most annoying thing about this sickness was the fact that it came out of nowhere. I hadn't felt sick at all. I little tired perhaps, but I had not been sleeping well due to a combination of the dogs in our neighborhood suddenly deciding to chorus early in the AM, random phone calls on our house line before noon and the house behind us leaving their back porch light on so that it shines right into our bedroom. I need rooms dark like a tomb at night in order to sleep. Charming's weird schedule has not helped either and him getting home some nights not until 4:30 AM makes it hard for me to get a good night's sleep. I just don't sleep as well knowing he hasn't gotten home yet.
So there were no signs. Nothing to indicate I would be knocked out of commission for half a week. Which is way the only explanation is The Party.
The Party was Saturday night. I don't make it a habit to go out A) on work nights and B) without Charming. But since my brother has moved to town and knows no one but me and Charming I have taken pity on him for several Saturday's and taken him to a local pub where my work friends hang out and do karaoke. It's a fun time and I love doing it, but I usually end up staying out way too late and Charming gets jealous and upset because he can't go. He doesn't like that I go and have all this fun without him on the weekends and then when it comes to our days off together we don't do anything. But that's because nothing fun happens on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. This leads to quarrels and me accusing him of stifling me by making me stay home and pin for him (not true) and him accusing me of going out every night and pretending like I am not married (also not true)
So I agreed to not go out so much any more and he agreed to not get as upset (or at least keep it to himself) All was fine until The Party.
My friend at work was throwing a birthday bash for her boyfriend, who happens to be a big 80's hair band rock icon. I haven't been to a party like this is a really long time. Before I met Charming I went to them all the time and hobnobbed with celebrities and important folk. Ironically I move to Vegas and go to none of these parties where they flourish like Lindsay Lohan's court appearances. So I really wanted to go to this party. REALLY wanted to go. Charming didn't say nay and I happily bought a new dress and got all dolled up and went to The Party solo.
It was crazy. People packed everywhere. Paparazzi blindly flashing everyone. Free alcohol! And there was my downfall. See, as a woman I have very rarely ever bought myself a drink. I am not ashamed to admit that if I am out with mixed company I make the guys buy me drinks. Okay, maybe make them is not quite accurate. I don't stop them from offering. And if no one offers, I don't drink. This is another issue Charming has about going out. Because when I go out with guy friends from work or my brother, I never have to pay a dime. He however, has to pay for his own drinks. So going out for him can get expensive. I personally don't see the problem in this since I am not spending money when I go out, but I guess he has a point.
But when there is an open bar, watch out. When in a social setting I have little to no control over my drinking ability. Another thing Charming complains about is the fact that I will go out and get drunk with friends at a bar or a house party but I won't drink with him at home. Well, I don't like to drink at home. I'm a social drinker. In order for me to drink I need to be in a social situation having fun. This is why I was so popular in my sorority. I become a different person when out in these situations. Charming has limited experience with me like that because I just don't do it any more. I know I have issues with it so I don't put myself in those situations. Although lately I have been in those situations more and more and he is not liking what he is seeing.
So at The Party they have free champagne and free vodka and mixers. I start with champagne. I am chatting with my work friends, meeting new people, taking pictures and having a ball. Six glasses of champagne later and I'm getting hit on by first a guy and than two separate women, one of whom invites me to be her best friend if I will come stay with her in her house in Palm Springs because she is so lonely. After telling all of them, sorry, I'm flattered but married (the Palm Springs chick insisted I could bring Charming along and we "would have oodles of fun!" Yeah, lady, I am not letting you within a mile of my husband with those perky tits) I switch to vodka and cranberry juice and sit with my friends as we exchange work stories and comment on the people surrounding us. Carrot Top, Flavor Flav and Brandon Michael Smith (some Disney star) are in attendance and I grab some pictures. Now, as much fun as I am having I am wishing every second that Charming was there. Going out without him just doesn't feel quite right. So I start texting him to come by when he is off work. At 4 AM.
By this time the party has moved to another club and my friend and I have snagged a half full bottle of Belvedere vodka to swig on the way. The next club has music so loud my chest is reverberating. Or maybe that is my cell phone. It's Charming, calling to see where I am, none too pleased because I tell him I am in no condition to drive home. I thought I would get points for asking him to come get me instead of attempting to drive home, but no, this makes him even more upset. In my drunken state, I was confused as to why he wouldn't meet us and come have some fun. It wasn't until the next day I understood that he had worked a whole shift, it was after 4AM and he was not in the mood to deal with drunken people. I don't really blame him. He had to pick up his drunk wife at some celebrity party he couldn't go to and leave her car at the hotel casino in order to take her home. Good times.
So I was stupid. And we had a huge fight. All is well now but as a consolation prize for my stupidity I got sick. Either my immune system was compromised from all the alcohol I consumed and second-hand smoke I inhaled, or someone at the party was sick and being in such close proximity (I got goosed so many times I stopped turning around to see who had grabbed me. It wasn't intentional, it was just packed.) I was privy to their germs.
I blame Palm Springs girl. She was the only one who tried to kiss me.
