The One With This And That

I have had a bunch of things bouncing around in my head for awhile. Time to do a bullet list!

~We are currently battling with our insurance company and the hospital Charming went to when we was ill due to the $4000 bills we have received. We are hoping for a reduction from the hospital or an increase in what the insurance will cover. We don't want to pay nothing, he did have the services after all, but we should have only paid $100 and then some for the doctor. I am thinking this will not go away any time soon and lawyers may get involved. Joy.

~And in the middle of all this medical bill crap our promissory note for the short-sale decided to kick in. We had been in a state of repose until Wells Fargo got their act together and sent the info to the housing insurance company. I would have been happy with another six to twelve months of not having to pay but no such luck. Wells Fargo sent in their information and now we have another $120 bill each month. Joy times two. Charming blames the fact we called them last month to give them our new address and they suddenly realized, hey we are not screwing them any more, let's make them pay when they can't afford it.

~Portia has started scratching her nose constantly with her back feet, like she has an incessant itchy nose. The problem is she uses her back claws and now has permanent gouges in and around her nose she is reopening with every scratch. I have tried putting bag balm on to ease the itching and the bleeding but since it is her nose she just licks it off. I am sure it is an allergy of some kind but can't figure out what it could be other than the carpet in the new house. I think I may have to take her to the vet to get a steroid shot or she is going to have no nose left.

~Also, the cats have begun crapping outside their litter box the day before I change it/scoop the poop. It's always on the mat right outside the box like they couldn't bear to go inside and do their business so they just did it in the next available spot. We get trash picked up twice a week so on Monday's I clean the box and on Thursdays I scoop out all the poop and sprinkle scented powder on the litter. They have never had a problem before. I would scoop it more often but I don't have anywhere to store the poop in between garbage days. And the garage would STINK if I put it out there in the heat. So I tried cutting back on their food a bit, not giving them as much dry. Which doubly works because Portia could benefit from dropping a pound or two. She is not overly fat yet but she could head that way. So far no poop outside the box...but it is trash day tomorrow, they still have some time.

~Went and saw Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 and OH. MY. GOD. It was AMAZING! I wanted to turn around and see it again right away. Just the perfect conclusion to an incredible series. But I am also sad that it is all over now. I am going to miss Harry. He has been a part of my life longer than I have been with Charming.

~Speaking of movies, there are so many I want to see. But we can not afford at all to see any of them. We made an exception for Harry Potter because, well, it's Harry freakin' Potter and that needed to be seen. Even so, we saved up and made it an experience for both of us. But other films, like Friends With Benefits, Crazy, Stupid, Love and The Help (which I also read and was incredible) are a few that pop into my head, I will wait for DVD. I still have to see Black Swan and The King's Speech. I am seriously behind on my TV viewing.

~I wish I could be at Comic-Con this year. A lot of my favorite shows/movies/actors are there. Seeing it online is not quite the same.

~Work sucks. That's all I am going to say about that.

~We got to meet another blogger friend. Jen and her husband came to Vegas for a conference and we managed to cram a bunch of stuff in over the two days they were here. We had such a great time with them and hope they return soon! We have so much more to do with them. Jennifer is just as nice and sweet as I always knew she would be. So that is now my 9th Internet/blogger meet up that has been a success. But there are several more I would love to meet still!

~I have been on a reading frenzy. I blew through Lynsay Sands' Argeaneu series, all thirteen books, in about a month. I love being able to read so much but I know once the fall TV season starts up I will drop down again.

~I am itching to go to New York again and see some shows. And if the rumors prove true, and Darren Criss replaces Daniel Radcliffe in "How To Succeed..." I will be on a plane to NY so fast it will make your head spin.

~I am sure there is more but I am tired and I should probably tackle some things I have been neglecting. Namely the mountain of laundry in my family room.

The One With The Day Before

I'm exhausted.

Between working and packing and hauling crap to the new place I am not sure what day it is or what my name is. I do however know that tomorrow is the BIG move. We are well prepared I think. The only things left in the old house are the large furniture. Our bedroom set, a couch, two love seats, two chairs, two entertainment centers, two desks, the cat condo, a bench, the bar, a small table, the beer fridge and one giant massive TV. Still not sure how we are going to move that 52" behemoth.

More bullet points for you:

~The lady from CenturyLink called. Apparently she had been trying to get a hold of me for the past few days but couldn't leave a message on our machine. (?) Any way, she said our appointment is all set for Tuesday and she would call me back to do the third party confirmation again. Still have not heard from her so I am not holding my breath about Tuesday. I have Cox on stand by after I see what happens.

~I convinced Charming that we didn't need to believe the Culligan guy (he was making a sales pitch after all) and we are having someone from the Water Authority to come test the water. I am sure they will tell us it is safe to drink just too hard. Then we need to talk to the owner about putting a water loop in so we can get a softener. I hope they agree since we did not know it did not have the loop and we can't install a softener without one.

~This house does not have a microwave. but never fear, we have one from our old apartment in Massachusetts! It's been boxed up all safe for eight years. We dug it out today and the first thing we noticed is the Styrofoam surrounding the microwave had melted to the plug. But it wasn't on the connectors so Charming scraped it off and we plugged it in. We put it on for 30 seconds and when we opened the door it was smoking. So we will be getting a new microwave. I guess the 115 degree heat got to it in our garage.

~We have some unwanted tenants in our garage, front stoop and back patio. I had parked in the garage to unload the electronics today because I didn't want anyone to see and get the idea to break into the new house. I walked to my car and saw something in the peripheral vision. I stopped inches in front of a Black Widow on a strand of web. I think it was dead but my shrieking called Charming who immediately swatted it with his hat...INTO MY FACE!! After many many minutes of doing the spidey dance and almost stripping on the driveway we still couldn't find it. So Charming sprayed everywhere and tomorrow we have to vacuum suck the little baddies up. He didn't tell me how many he found but he said "Enough." That is enough for me to know.

~Tomorrow night, while I am tired beyond belief in a new house surrounded by boxes and boxes of our crap, I mean beloved belongings, the cast of Glee will be performing at Mandalay Bay. To say it is ironic that I am actually off on the night of the concert and can't afford tickets hurts my soul.

~Today we ran to the store to pick up a few things since Charming can still only eat specific stuff. The cart we selected had some of its side wires broken and a sharp piece stuck up on one side. I didn't realized this and leaned right over it to place something in the cart. A sharp stabbing pain hit my stomach and I lifted my shirt to see I had punctured myself in the gut. It wasn't very deep, only through a layer of skin or so, and it bled very little but it stung like a bitch. In the checkout I asked the clerk if they had a first aid kit so I could clean the wound and put some antiseptic on it. Even though it went through my shirt, I don't know what is on that cart, so I wanted to get it cleaned up fast. Right when I finished the manager came up all worried. I showed him the cart and my bandaged cut and he about fell over himself with apologies. I think he thought I was going to sue or something. He kept asking if I wanted to fill out an incident report. I assured him I was fine, just wanted to make sure that cart gotten taken off the floor so no one else got hurt. He practically followed us all the way outside, apologizing again and again. Once in the car Charming remarked we should have demanded our groceries for free.

~Tomorrow I go to pick up the truck so Charming, who has to work tomorrow night and is working tonight until 3 AM, can sleep as much as he can before the insanity begins. So I will get the truck. The 27 foot truck. I am a tiny bit concerned. I have never driven anything so big. The only good thing is it is a pretty much straight shot from the truck place to our house so I won't have to turn too much.

I will see you all on the other side in our new house. If I survive that is...

The One Where We Take More Hits

And the hits just keep on coming...

~CenturyLink never called me back. So I called them AGAIN yesterday. Told the whole story to another person, who was a bit of a prick at first, until he pulled up the account and saw everything that had transpired. And this time they didn't include all of the service. So once again, everything had to be redone. This time, the sales person told me he would call me when he got off work on his own time to tell me when we sorted everything out and got us squared away. Once again, no call. So Charming and I decided that we would not go with them. We gave them five chances to prove to us they were worth of our business, way more chances than we should have given them, and they failed spectacularly each and every time. Ironically enough I received a robo call from CentruyLink today saying "there has been an update on your account, please call us to confirm." No thank you, and shove it.

~Yesterday the wind got worse and worse throughout the night so we had to stop things a bit early. Then last night around 3:30 AM I was awakened by the most horrendous noise. I thought a freight train was coming through our room. And then when I woke up enough to realize what it was I really thought we were in the middle of a tornado. The whole house was shaking, the roar unbearable. I couldn't sleep. So waking up at 7 AM was difficult. But we did and trudged over to the new house to meet the painter. It was a cloudless day, cold but nice. So happy to have dodged the weather bullet. An hour later the clouds plowed in and it poured. Off and on all day. Made moving really really difficult. And then I had to go to work and leave Charming all alone to finish moving things by himself.

~Today we had the Culligan water guy come by and assess our water since this house did not have a water softener. Vegas water is notoriously hard and usually softeners are needed. We knew this going in and were expecting to rent a softener for the time of our lease. What we did not expect was the Culligan guy to tell us that the water was hard and that it was undrinkable. In fact we shouldn't even bathe in it! Well, needless to say this changed things. We did not expect the water to be dangerous. And in order to make the water okay it is going to cost us a lot more money a month we can spend. So now we have to fight with the property manager/owner and hope they agree to install a softener and we will cover the filtering system. Or else I am not sure what we are going to done. Because we have to live there. But we need water too. I just worry because we knew there was no softener going in. I hope they can't hold the fact we had this knowledge before hand over our heads. We knew we needed a softener, we did not know the water wasn't safe softener or no softener. And that, to me, should be something the owner should take care of. I mean, it is a health issue, so they should have to make the house safe for us, right?

~In moving things yesterday we parked my car in our new driveway. Neither of us realized how steep the driveway was since we had not driven a car up on it when we looked at it. Now my car was bottoming out going up the driveway. Sure it was loaded down, but this got us to thinking. Charming's car is way lower than mine. How would he get his car up that steep an incline? And if he can't park in the garage what were we going to do? He couldn't park it on the street because he doesn't drive it every day. The HOA would certainly tow it. So another case of we didn't think things through enough and now we are stuck with the consequences. When are we going to learn to cover every single angle before jumping into something? I don't consider us impulsive people but we must be because we constantly get caught in these situations.

UPDATE: Since starting this post things have slowly been looking up. After having a mini breakdown when Charming called to tell me about the water issues, I directed probably the best show of my life which has nothing to do with our problems but did wonders to improving my mood. Then the rain stopped. And Charming called to tell me that he brought his car over and tested it out in the garage and as long as he goes super slow his car doesn't hit anything! He has only about a half inch of clearance but it clears. We rejoiced and I am thankful that I have someone in this mess with me who takes solace in the good we have together.

So I am holding on to the small wins. I will not let the bigger problems get me down. Everything will work out. Positive thinking!

The One With The Treasure Hunt

In between all the packing craziness, Charming and I have been participating in a treasure hunt for the last two weeks. Because we certainly didn't have enough to do.

A local coin shop holds a yearly treasure hunt for a $10,000 gold medallion. Over two weeks you travel around to different points all over the valley to get clues from different merchants. The clues all lead to the exact location of the medallion. Last year it was so hard no one even came close to finding the prize so we were told they made it a bit easier this year. However, the clues were still incredibly obscure and could have lead to a half dozen different things.

Charming and I dutifully went to each clue spot and got our stamps. And after each clue we would sit and ponder the possibilities. One such clue said "Of about 300 in Nevada this one has over 600." See what I mean about obscure? That could be anything! We thought about casinos, stores, schools, banks. We knew it had to be some place that wouldn't mind participating in such a hunt and along the same lines of where we were getting the clues. But it was befuddling.

However, by clue four I had narrowed it down to three possibilities. The fourth clue mentioned "flouresense." The specific spelling of this word had to mean something. So I figured it referred to either a bakery (flour, of course), a flower shop (this was a reach but maybe it was relating to the French word for flower "fleur") or a jewelry store (the sparkle of a diamond is sometimes called the flouresense.) Nevada could certainly have about 300 of any of these things but I was thinking jewelry store was the best possibility since it was the most likely partner with a coin store.

At least I had convinced myself of that.

When we got the last clue on Friday it finally clued us in that I was on the right track all along. "The 2nd is Taylor. The 1st is Morgan. Both are jewels." A quick Google search and we discovered a Morgan Taylor Jewelers. We hot footed it over there and prepared to go in and poke around. A previous clue mentioned about asking DG if it is behind it and be careful because we only get to ask once. So we had to be exactly sure we knew what we were asking before we did.

Charming and I walked inside the store and immediately inside the door we saw a brochure for the coin store. We were in the right place! Now to figure out exactly where the medallion was hidden. All over the walls were paintings. "Ask DG if it is behind it." So it had to be behind a painting. Using hushed tones, Charming and I began to study the paintings to figure out which one would be the one to give up the prize. As we made our way around the room a man came from behind the curtain in the back of the store. He asked if he could help us and we told him no, too afraid of saying anything and giving up our one shot at winning. The man watched us for a minute and then cleared his throat as he realized we were scrutinizing the artwork on the walls.

"So, are you looking for the medallion?"

Charming and I looked at each other, unsure of what to say. "Uh, yes?" I stammered, still not wanting to say too much.

"Yeah, someone already found it about an hour ago."

An hour ago. We were an hour away from getting there first. And we happened to be right in front of the painting it had been hidden behind. Turns out the owner's initials are DG and he was the one to ask. But we never got that far. So close and yet so far.

All and all a bit disappointing, but a learning experience. We were pretty proud of ourselves for figuring it out all the way to the end. Unfortunately it was our tried asses who couldn't get up soon enough to be the first ones to get the final clue that failed. Next year will be different. We will be there ready to go before the places open. We got to turn our completed clue cards in for a chance to win $1,000 so we may still get something. But it was the idea of winning the gold medallion ourselves that gave the allure for the chase.

Probably the closest we would ever get to feeling like pirates.

The One With The Move

Well, we didn't get the Dream House.

At least, we probably didn't get it.

That lady came back and said she wanted it and the property manager gave it to her. However, several things are in play. The lady's son really didn't want to move there and she had already put a deposit down on another place. She has until this weekend to sign the lease and if she doesn't we swoop in and take it.

However, in the meantime, the property manager, feeling guilty about how we got screwed out of our Dream House, showed us another property she had for lease. It's a little farther from where we wanted to be, not as nice as the Dream House, but better than where we are now. We are going to have to do some rearranging and figuring but we made the place we are in now work so we are up to the challenge. We agreed to move into this second house because 1) we wanted to stay with the property manager who is really nice and attentive and took care of all of our concerns. And 2) if we stuck with the property manager as soon as the Dream House became available we could move into it. Because no matter what we wanted that house, even if it means moving AGAIN. Ugh.

So we are now in the process of packing everything up. And man, I think all of our shit has accumulated over this past year. I don't remember there being this much stuff to pack. It also makes me worry about where we are going to put it all. But like I said, we made this house we are in now work, we will make this new one work.

We are moving the 21st. Because the 29th is a holiday and there is no way we would find anyone who could help us. That leaves us a little more than two weeks to get everything together and packed and ready to go. I am trying not to stress but it is hard. Since we don't have to be out of our old place until June 1st we are going to hold a garage sale the 28th to get rid of all the stuff we don't want to move. So if there is even a qualm about keeping something, into the garage sale pile it goes! Makes purging so much more fun now that I know I may make a profit off it and not have to pack something.

So things are moving along...and we are caught up in the whirlwind.

Of course we are still holding our breath through this weekend that we get that phone call saying the lady dropped out and the Dream House is ours.

Trying to keep the hope alive!

The One With The Dashed Dreams (Maybe...)

Today was supposed to be a better day.

I mean, yes, my brother was leaving to move to Virginia and it was hard to say goodbye to him. But I know I will see him again in January when he hopefully moves back.

But today was going to be great to two huge reasons.

Number one, the Royal Wedding is tonight. As I am a huge lover of anything and everything British, this is an event I am so happy to be able to witness. I know a lot of people are not interested and think I am insane for being so excited about two people I don't know getting married. But I am. It is a true fairy tale and I am going to be watching it front and center on TV tonight.

Number two, today we were going to find out that our dream house we wanted to rent was ours.

Were.

Let me back up.

We have been wanting to move out of our rental for some time. Actually since before we moved in. We rented it because it was close to Charming's mom and fit some of our needs and was okay. But we settled and we never quite warmed to the place. We knew there would be issues off the bat when we went to move in and the owner had not cleaned anything before she left or patched any holes or painted like she said she would. Ran out of time we were told. So we cleaned everything and steamed the carpets and Charming patched holes and painted. Then we had some issues we brought up with the management company. The fridge ran all the time, the microwave sounded like it was going to launch out of the house when it ran and we had some issues with the landscaping. Heard nothing back ever. Then we got some notes from the HOA. Third notices that had been given to the owner and then passed onto us. That's right, I said THIRD notices, when she was already threatened with a trial, that's when we heard of any issues. The final straw was when Charming heard voices outside our house one day and went outside to see a guy and a girl painting a wire on the side of the house. Apparently the owner had been threatened with a lien by the HOA to paint the wire the same color of the house or we would get thrown out.

We needed to get out. As much as we hated to move again it was necessary. Our lease is up at the end of May and then we are on a month to month. We figured we would find a place and then give them 30 days notice and move out.

So we started looking. It was discouraging because we were finding nothing that fit us. We didn't want to rush into something again and settle for something that didn't fit. We had been burned by first our house and then this rental so we were being a little cautious.

Then yesterday we found it. THE PERFECT HOUSE! This is the house I would buy if I could. Everything we wanted and more. I had to really nitpick to find things wrong with it that I could just deal with. And it had access to a clubhouse that houses two pools and fitness center and more! Plus it is only two blocks from Charming's mother's house so we would still be close to help her. The only issue was the rent was a bit higher than we wanted so we asked the property manager if the owner might meet the price we were paying now. She didn't think it would be a problem so she said she would ask the owner and get back to us today. So we left, glowing in the knowledge that we had finally found a place we could be happy.

Then this morning our rental management property called for the house we are currently in. Apparently the owner's new husband wanted a more definitive answer than just month to month and wanted us to secure another six months or a year. If we wanted to leave at the end of our lease we needed to go down today to give them written notice that we would be out by June 1st. We had had enough and went down with our letter. We figured no matter what we didn't want to stay in that place any more so we would be moving.

About five minutes after dropping off that letter the property manager from the dream house called. She had good news and bad news. The good news is the owner agreed to the lower rent. We said great! We would be over with a check right that minute. Then she said, well, that's the bad news. Apparently she had shown the place the day before to another lady and she was interested too. Since she was first seeing it she had first dibs. But, the lady wanted to wait until all the painting and cleaning and landscaping was done in two weeks before making a decision. We were ready right now despite the place not looking perfect when we saw it. So the property manager gave the woman until tomorrow, Friday, to tell her if she wanted the place or not. The property manager felt really bad because she knows how much we want it and we are willing to give her the deposit right now, but since this woman had seen it first she needed to give her time to decide. Never mind she saw it the day before us and wanted to wait and we were ready to go right now. If we had given a check yesterday to secure it, even without knowing if the owner would have come down on the rent, it would have been ours. But since no money changed hands she has to give the previous lady a chance.

Charming and I are devastated. Had we known someone else had seen it we would have given a deposit right away because it is the kind of place that would be snatched right up. And the property manager did admit she didn't come right out and tell us someone had seen it before but that she had mentioned that she was there the day before showing it. However, in my bliss at finding the perfect house I didn't hear that or comprehend what that meant. So now, because Charming and I were trying to be careful and not rush again we may miss out on our dream house. And this has happened four times to us before. It seems we are always just one step too late and then we find something not as good so we settle.

We are damned if we rush and damned if we wait.

But wait now we must. For the phone call saying this woman doesn't want it. My fear is that because she now knows we want it so bad she may just say yes because of that. The whole "Well, if it is in demand I must have it" mentality that people out here seem to have. I told Charming no matter what happens we will be okay, we always are, I just hope for a little leeway this time and that something goes our way for once.

The One With The Birthday Wishes

We interrupt my non-blogging to bring you this important message.

Today is Charming's birthday!!

He turns 36, but I am sure he did not want me to post that. Oh well.

I really wanted this year's birthday celebrations to be extra special considering I messed up big time last year with my leg deciding to give out during the infamous Dinner Turn and Snap and then days spent in doctor's offices, MRIs and X-rays. Not how I had planned his special day. So I went all out this year and planned a surprise get together at a local martini lounge on Wednesday night. I got Premium Bar service for ourselves and my brother (which I highly recommend if you ever come to Vegas, talk to me about this incredible service because it was well worth it! Private area, table and waitress and all we wanted to drink for 2 hours, about $35 a person!) and invited a bunch of people to join us throughout the night to celebrate. I even had a cake all planned for the big birthday moment.

I invited 22 people.

3 showed up. And one I didn't want there AT ALL.

Needless to say I was pissed and devastated. Then mortified when I had to recruit strangers from the next table to sing happy birthday to my guy because no one else was there. I felt horrible, but Charming said he still had a blast and that the thought was what counted. That I tried to make it spectacular was enough for him.

He is amazing.

Which is why I don't deserve such a fabulous man such as he and why I hope everyone today takes a moment out of their day to wish this amazing person Happy Birthday.

He is my one and only, my better half, my love and best friend.


Happy Birthday Poo!

The One With The Big Decision

Two weeks since I last posted?

Wait...I can explain.

Not only have I been sick STILL, after three long weeks, but I have been encompassed by weeks of torment and indecision.

And then intense rage.

But allow me to back up a bit...

My boss is leaving his position and moving out of state. The person ahead of me is taking over his position. That leaves the weekday supervisor position open for me to go for. Everyone wanted me to get it, producers, production crew, talent, even my soon-to-be-former boss and his replacement. I still had to apply but it was pretty much a given that I would get it if I wanted it.

The position would mean more responsibility, more money, a better title. Basically, the smart move for my resume. And I wanted it. I really REALLY wanted it. So bad I could taste it. I had actually been offered this position before and had to turn it down for personal reasons.

Which is why saying no, again, was the hardest thing I ever had to do.

You see, it is a Monday through Friday position. And while having Saturdays and Sundays off would be a dream come true for me, it would mean no days off with Charming. He tried, oh how he tried, to get his days switched. But the people who had Saturday and Sunday off at his work didn't want to switch. He couldn't even get Sunday and Monday off so we could have at least one day.

And the truth is, we hardly see each other outside of the days we have off together. His new much later schedule has him not even going to work until my shift is more than half over and him getting home long after I have gone to bed. And it is putting a strain on our relationship. He can't do things with me anymore, like go out after work, because he is working so late. This leads to jealousy and resentment and lots of other things that poison a relationship. There are several other factors as well, but quite frankly, we are struggling. Things are not going so well. So not having days off together would not have boded well for our relationship.

I agonized over this decision for weeks, waiting until the last minute to give them my decision. I didn't want to let anyone down and it seemed no matter what I chose I was going to hurt someone. In the end, my relationship with my husband meant more to me than any job and I politely declined to go for the position. I know it was the right thing to do, even though seeing the email today announcing who they selected for the position stabbed at my heart just a bit.

And then Charming comes home with a story that leads me to the livid portion of this story.

Charming needed to get an upcoming Saturday off and asked the one person who has Saturdays off at his work. The guy strung him along and then finally agreed to switch with Charming. He said he would work for Charming on that Saturday and Charming would work for him on Wednesday. The guy laughs and says, "Man, I'll have Wednesday off? Guess I'll have to do something with my wife since she is off that day too."

Charming looked at him and asked him what he meant.

The guy tells Charming that his wife has Tuesdays and Wednesdays off so he would have to see his wife if he didn't work that day.

Charming was dumbfounded. Tuesday and Wednesday are the days that Charming currently has off. The days he wanted to switch with someone so he could have Saturdays and Sundays off so I could go for the promotion. This guy has the days off Charming needed and this guy's wife has the days off he would have gotten if he had switched shifts with Charming.

When Charming asked him, why did he refuse to switch shifts with Charming when he could have had days off with his wife if he did, the guy replied, AND I QUOTE, "I don't want days off with my wife all the time. What am I, crazy?"

I informed Charming he should never, under any circumstances, point out this particular employee to me because I would not be able to stop myself from castrating him for causing me and my husband and everyone I work with undue stress and insanity for weeks when all he needed to do was say yes to a situation that would have worked for everyone.

I guess some people get married to NOT spend time with that person. Who's the crazy one?

Livid.

LIVID!!

The One With The Night Out

I had big plans for this week.

Plans to blog about some pretty important things that had come up in my life recently.

Plans to hold true to my "blogging three times a week" promise.

But then IT happened.

The Big Sick 2011.

I have been incapacitated since Sunday night, unable to breathe due to the amount of crud clogging up my pipes. It was impossible for me to sleep due to the fact any prone position would make me gag and choke and feel like I was drowning. Not a fun sensation. I can absolutely cross off downing as preferred ways to die. Due to the inability to sleep issue I was unable to work on Monday and then spent the entirety of my weekend dragging myself between the couch and the bed, trying to find a position that was moderately comfortable enough for me to get some rest while alternately attempting to cough up or throw up whatever was clogging my throat. I missed work, I missed time doing valuable errands, I missed time spent with my husband but most upsetting, I missed my MIL's birthday. Thankfully I convinced Charming to leave me on my death bed and go take his mother out for some fun so I didn't ruin everything.

The most annoying thing about this sickness was the fact that it came out of nowhere. I hadn't felt sick at all. I little tired perhaps, but I had not been sleeping well due to a combination of the dogs in our neighborhood suddenly deciding to chorus early in the AM, random phone calls on our house line before noon and the house behind us leaving their back porch light on so that it shines right into our bedroom. I need rooms dark like a tomb at night in order to sleep. Charming's weird schedule has not helped either and him getting home some nights not until 4:30 AM makes it hard for me to get a good night's sleep. I just don't sleep as well knowing he hasn't gotten home yet.

So there were no signs. Nothing to indicate I would be knocked out of commission for half a week. Which is way the only explanation is The Party.

The Party was Saturday night. I don't make it a habit to go out A) on work nights and B) without Charming. But since my brother has moved to town and knows no one but me and Charming I have taken pity on him for several Saturday's and taken him to a local pub where my work friends hang out and do karaoke. It's a fun time and I love doing it, but I usually end up staying out way too late and Charming gets jealous and upset because he can't go. He doesn't like that I go and have all this fun without him on the weekends and then when it comes to our days off together we don't do anything. But that's because nothing fun happens on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. This leads to quarrels and me accusing him of stifling me by making me stay home and pin for him (not true) and him accusing me of going out every night and pretending like I am not married (also not true)

So I agreed to not go out so much any more and he agreed to not get as upset (or at least keep it to himself) All was fine until The Party.

My friend at work was throwing a birthday bash for her boyfriend, who happens to be a big 80's hair band rock icon. I haven't been to a party like this is a really long time. Before I met Charming I went to them all the time and hobnobbed with celebrities and important folk. Ironically I move to Vegas and go to none of these parties where they flourish like Lindsay Lohan's court appearances. So I really wanted to go to this party. REALLY wanted to go. Charming didn't say nay and I happily bought a new dress and got all dolled up and went to The Party solo.

It was crazy. People packed everywhere. Paparazzi blindly flashing everyone. Free alcohol! And there was my downfall. See, as a woman I have very rarely ever bought myself a drink. I am not ashamed to admit that if I am out with mixed company I make the guys buy me drinks. Okay, maybe make them is not quite accurate. I don't stop them from offering. And if no one offers, I don't drink. This is another issue Charming has about going out. Because when I go out with guy friends from work or my brother, I never have to pay a dime. He however, has to pay for his own drinks. So going out for him can get expensive. I personally don't see the problem in this since I am not spending money when I go out, but I guess he has a point.

But when there is an open bar, watch out. When in a social setting I have little to no control over my drinking ability. Another thing Charming complains about is the fact that I will go out and get drunk with friends at a bar or a house party but I won't drink with him at home. Well, I don't like to drink at home. I'm a social drinker. In order for me to drink I need to be in a social situation having fun. This is why I was so popular in my sorority. I become a different person when out in these situations. Charming has limited experience with me like that because I just don't do it any more. I know I have issues with it so I don't put myself in those situations. Although lately I have been in those situations more and more and he is not liking what he is seeing.

So at The Party they have free champagne and free vodka and mixers. I start with champagne. I am chatting with my work friends, meeting new people, taking pictures and having a ball. Six glasses of champagne later and I'm getting hit on by first a guy and than two separate women, one of whom invites me to be her best friend if I will come stay with her in her house in Palm Springs because she is so lonely. After telling all of them, sorry, I'm flattered but married (the Palm Springs chick insisted I could bring Charming along and we "would have oodles of fun!" Yeah, lady, I am not letting you within a mile of my husband with those perky tits) I switch to vodka and cranberry juice and sit with my friends as we exchange work stories and comment on the people surrounding us. Carrot Top, Flavor Flav and Brandon Michael Smith (some Disney star) are in attendance and I grab some pictures. Now, as much fun as I am having I am wishing every second that Charming was there. Going out without him just doesn't feel quite right. So I start texting him to come by when he is off work. At 4 AM.

By this time the party has moved to another club and my friend and I have snagged a half full bottle of Belvedere vodka to swig on the way. The next club has music so loud my chest is reverberating. Or maybe that is my cell phone. It's Charming, calling to see where I am, none too pleased because I tell him I am in no condition to drive home. I thought I would get points for asking him to come get me instead of attempting to drive home, but no, this makes him even more upset. In my drunken state, I was confused as to why he wouldn't meet us and come have some fun. It wasn't until the next day I understood that he had worked a whole shift, it was after 4AM and he was not in the mood to deal with drunken people. I don't really blame him. He had to pick up his drunk wife at some celebrity party he couldn't go to and leave her car at the hotel casino in order to take her home. Good times.

So I was stupid. And we had a huge fight. All is well now but as a consolation prize for my stupidity I got sick. Either my immune system was compromised from all the alcohol I consumed and second-hand smoke I inhaled, or someone at the party was sick and being in such close proximity (I got goosed so many times I stopped turning around to see who had grabbed me. It wasn't intentional, it was just packed.) I was privy to their germs.

I blame Palm Springs girl. She was the only one who tried to kiss me.

The One With The Challenge: My Day, In Great Detail

As previously stated yesterday, I am not going over my day in detail. There's not much to write about there. I get up, take a walk, sit in front of the TV, get dressed, go to work, sit in front of more TVs and then come home...to sit in front of the TV. Not very exciting.

So I am taking a suggestion made yesterday to talk about my first kiss. It sounded like a good topic.

Actually, I am going to talk about my first kiss and my last first kiss.

My first kiss was sweet, as first kisses should be. I was nine and my best friend lived up the street from me. Patrick and I had been thick as thieves. I was always riding my bike up to his house or he rode his down to mine. We hung out and played the way nine year-old kids can when they are still young enough to have fun and not worry about the boy/girl thing. When I heard that his family was moving away to North Carolina I was devastated. I could not imagine not having him nearby.

Patrick came by the day before he was supposed to leave. We sat on my front stoop and just enjoyed the last few moments we had together before he had to go. Pretty soon, as the sun began to set, the moment came where he had to leave. I walked him down my driveway as he pushed his bike along. We stopped at the end before he climbed on to pedal away. He turned and leaned down to kiss me. It was short, sweet and soft. The perfect goodbye. And then he rode off without looking back as I cried.

I talked to Patrick for years after that, even seeing him once three years later on our way down to Florida. We kept in touch off and on and he even came to Cleveland my senior year of college to take me to my winter formal. Unfortunately, he had different ideas that trip so it did not end as well as that first eventful parting. But I will always hold a special place for him in my heart because he made that momentous event a good memory for me to cherish.

My last first kiss was, obviously, from the lips of my husband. Charming and I met June 1st, 2000 when he was moving my roommate, his brother, into our apartment. When he left to go back to Pennsylvania I asked my roommate for Charming's phone number and we began a month long communication spree of phone calls and emails. We talked several times a day, some times for hours on end.

Charming and I did not see each other again until June 30th when he came back to Cleveland to visit me. I was at a concert when he arrived and nervous about seeing me again, Charming proceeded to get toasted with his brother. When I returned home I found them in very high spirits. Both Charming and I were acting a bit shy, exchanging pleasantries and random information about our days. Soon it was time to turn in. We lay on my bed, just laying there, looking at each other. I noticed the chain he wore had its clasp in the front. I told him the habit I have of holding the clasp, making a wish and then kissing it before turning it around to the back. I told him to make a wish and kiss the clasp then I turned it around to the back before leaning in to kiss him on the lips. He smiled when I pulled back and said that I had made his wish come true.

I do believe I fell in love with him head over heels right in that moment.

Tomorrow, no week in detail. I'm coming up with something new.

The One With The Dreaded Day

One year.

Wednesday will be one year since my father-in-law passed.

How can it be one year already?

I still have flashbacks to those five days in the hospital. Especially after spending four days in a hospital in Ohio. I still wake up shaking with his slack face stuck in my mind staring at me from that hospital bed.

So much has changed in what feels like a short amount of time.

Charming still hasn't processed his loss. He has moments where it hits him like a sledgehammer and he just breaks down, but mostly he stays strong. For his mom. Because she is still having a tough time. She has come leaps and bounds in her ability to live alone but there are still set-backs and problems.

It's only been a year. And at the same time, it's been a year already?

I worry about Wednesday. About how that date will affect Charming. I worry he has it all bottled up inside and it will burst free on Wednesday.

We will not be home. We will be away, trying to keep busy. Distracting ourselves from the reality that is now our lives.

The One With The Week One Progress

Starting Weight: 257.5
Weight Today: 253

I am trying not to get too excited by those numbers since I am sure I only lost about two pounds. The first number came from when I was weighed on a different scale with all my clothes on after eating a huge lunch four days before my period started. The second number was taken in the middle of my period, naked and first thing in the morning. So this week is not completely accurate. For me the number that will really chart my progress will be next week's. Although I am very happy it did go down and not up.

Today we added more weight to my leg weights and tacked on another 15 minutes to our walk. It was a blustery cold and windy time but we did it. We completed our walk. Charming charted the complaints I had throughout the 45 minute trek and wanted me to list them here:

~These weights are too heavy.
~My feet hurt.
~My legs hurt.
~I have a stitch in my side.
~My ears are too cold.
~My ears hurt.
~The wind is pushing against me.
~My back hurts.
~I can't talk because I can't breathe.
~I'm hungry.
~I don't want to go anymore.
~Those cars driving by are too loud.
~My butt is sweating.
~I have a puddle of not good things in my pants.
~My shirt keeps riding up.
~Are we done yet???

I really am a whiny bitch when exercising.

But Charming would also like me to tell you that I didn't quit and finished the walk and all my exercises after. So while I may be complaining a lot, at least I am still doing what I need to do and he is proud of me. I really have no choice, he is a slave driver. In fact I think I may have muttered one more complaint that he didn't include...something about wishing bad things upon him if he would just let me stop. He knows I don't mean anything I say when I am pushing myself so maybe that's why it didn't make the list.

I was unsure if I was going to walk today due to the issue I had early this morning. I was awakened by the feeling of having a bowel movement, but out the other hole. I made it to the toilet and the scene that unfolded was the worst I have ever endured. Pieces as big as two half dollars were vacating my body. I had to run a bath because there was no way to clean myself up enough with just toilet paper. I remembered all of your helpful and concerned comments about my periods on my previous post and this scared me enough to put a call in to the doctor, which I am still waiting to hear a response from. I mean, it woke me up it was so massive. That just can't be right. I only hope it is nothing huge because I'm not sure if I can take more bad news.

It seems like that is the only kind I get.

*Don't forget to check out the Healthy Blogger Club blog! I'm even featured in the Wednesday post! Join us in our fight to get healthy.

The One With The Workout Update

It's Day Five in what Charming has been calling Whip (Princess)'s Butt Into Shape, which makes the really cool acronym WABIS that he shouts at me when I say I want to lie down and coma for awhile.

"Come on, remember how good you feel after you WABIS!"

"Don't quit now, this WABIS will get you to your goal!"

"If you don't WABIS, no zipline for you."

So then I scream a little more and do the exercises and huff and puff and wish to die to stop the pain but then it's over and I feel...okay. I am not quite to the point where those glorious endorphins kick in and make me turn into an exercise goddess. There's still too much fat for them to fight through.

I have not had a soda since Tuesday. In fact I have not had anything other than water since Wednesday, besides a glass of orange juice yesterday. If I am hungry, I have a glass of water. So far I have not felt like my stomach is eating itself yet. I have been eating salads and sandwiches and have stayed away from fast food and too much chocolate. Hey, I couldn't give up caffeine and chocolate completely cold turkey! I would go into shock. So it is only a mini-bar from our Halloween supply a day in my dinner. And I look forward to it so much it is an actual treat.

I don't feel any better or different yet. Although I am sleeping through the night from pure exhaustion. I walk 30 minutes every morning, with weights on my ankles and hand weights. I then do five sets of going up and down the stairs, 10 leg lifts on each leg and five with both to strengthen my abdominal muscles. All of this is with the leg weights too. And let me tell you, I can feel it in my stomach. I also added a 30 minute walk on the treadmill at work during my dinner break. I figure moving a bit more wouldn't hurt. Thursday is my weigh day to see if I have accomplished anything. I am doubting I see a change so soon, but Charming is confident we will see some weight loss from just the no soda/water all the time thing. I didn't have the heart to tell him I am due for my period so anything I may have lost will be back in water weight.

I am getting a bit more help from my friend pogonip who had resurrected her Healthy Blogger Club blog. I plan on making frequent visits there and chart my progress as well as see what great healthy ideas other bloggers come up with. If you get a chance stop on by and check it out and contribute if you wish.

So I am moving and doing and working as hard as I can for now. Charming is a drill sergeant and he promises to increase my exercising each week so I am constantly building. Next week we walk for 45 minutes and put more reps of stairs and leg lifts into the program. Possibly incorporate bike rides and some basketball in there too. He has been a great supporter and wonderful with coming up with ideas. So for now I am working it.

I just hope I don't get bored because that is when I shut down.

The One With The Birthday Reflection

So yesterday was my 33rd birthday.

Wait, let me back up. I know it has been awhile since I wrote here but I have been supremely busy trying not to lose my sanity amidst the craziness that has become our lives in trying to short-sell our house. We have made a bit of progress but I'll save that for another post. Also work has been increasingly stupid. And I mean that in the most real way possible. But again, another post.

However, Charming and I did go away on a short but good trip to Massachusetts. Originally we were going to visit Maine but plans changed at the last minute and we spent the whole four and a half days with my parents. Since no one knew we were coming we didn't see too many people but those we did see made our trip memorable.

We managed to find really reasonable flights, however the catch was an overnight flight with a 3 hour 4AM layover in Milwaukee on our way out and a 6AM flight with a layover in Chicago on our way back to Vegas. These flights proved that we are no longer as young and resilient as we used to be. Three days later and we are still trying to recover.

So it was bad timing that our tiring return occurred the day before my birthday. Lost in the fog of exhaustion of being up for over 24 hours straight two days out of five and dealing with jet-lag on top of having to work right before and right after both flights, October 29th was a tiny bit forgotten about. It did not even feel like it was my birthday. Sure I had a bunch of people send me birthday wishes on Facebook and through text messages, my brother and mother-in-law called me and I even got two surprise gifts from people I wasn't expecting anything from. But since I have never worked on my birthday EVER, having to go in on my day made it a non-birthday in my mind. Charming, all screwed up from our quick trip, didn't even get me a card. He figured since we were doing things for my birthday on days we could actually enjoy them (i.e. next Wednesday) he was off the hook for the actual day. But no recognition from him, no calls from my parents whom we had just seen the day before so maybe they figured they wished me happy birthday enough, and no card from my grandparents who ALWAYS remembers to send me one really brought me down. I don't look forward to my birthday as it is so this made the day even more depressing. But again, the fact that it didn't feel like my birthday made me highly more functional than my usual reaction of curling into a ball and not coming out until Halloween. (Retraction: The card from my grandparents was in our mailbox today, not delivered on Friday due to no mail service on Nevada Day. And my parents did call, my stupid phone just didn't register the voicemails until now so they were lost in cyberspace. This is why I don't like computer based phones. Charming also mentioned he was planning on getting me a card all along on Friday since he was so tired on Thursday so me saying something to him didn't change that fact. Thus I apologize to everyone I upset by saying no one remembered my birthday.)

Going to work sucked since no one there recognized my birthday either. I felt like I was walking around in that horrible nightmare when you are treated like you don't exist. Admittedly, it was Nevada Day, two days before Halloween and four days before a very big election. So everyone was busy with everything else. Still I would have liked at least a happy birthday from someone. Then, in between news shows, I happened t look up and spy Charming's cousins coming into my control room bearing balloons, a birthday head band that said "Birthday Princess" and huge smiles, proud of themselves for pulling off surprising me. It was a birthday miracle, they saved the day! And all at once I felt special. And with the headband and balloons other people noticed and soon I was getting birthday well wishes. I began to feel a little better. Once I got home I found a card from Charming and Drumsticks in the freezer, a small attempt at winning me back and righting his earlier birthday wrong.

So while it wasn't an incredible birthday to make me feel better it was uneventful enough to make me not care about aging which I guess is all I can ask for as I get a year older every year.

Stay tuned for a report about my birthday wish to ride the zipline under the Fremont canopy. Might as well be stupid while I am still young enough to enjoy it.

The Post With The Hard Negotiations

For those of you who may not know the nightmare situation we have been involved in since December, mainly because I don't like to talk about it due to the fact the stress of the situation gives me hives, we are in the middle of attempting to short sale our house.

I say attempting since the act of actually completing this task is proving to be impossible due to a certain asshole bank that rhymes with Fells Wago blocking us at every turn. Somehow they seem to hold the fact my husband's father died, we make no money and our house is now worth about a third of what we paid for it as our fault and we just need to suck it up and take the fall. The hoops we have jumped through for over ten months boggles my mind and still we had no answer if the sale approval would come or not.

Then on Tuesday we learned our fate.

The sale would be approved...IF we paid the PMI a $10,000 promissory note.

This is Fells Wago's way of pushing the blame off of them and onto the insurers of the loan so they can sleep free and clear at night and not wonder about the poor little people they screw over on a daily basis.

We don't have $10,000. Nor do we have a way to pay that amount out over a number of years since it would mean adding another $140 to our monthly expenses. Our monthly expenses hardly leave room for us to eat as it is. Tack on another almost hundred and a half and I'll be losing weight through starvation. Plus, I really don't want to give these assholes any more of my hard earned money. They already have over ninety grand in interest from our loan, have ruined our credit and taken our sanity. And now they want MORE? I don't think so.

But, if we don't pay they won't approve the sale. And then everyone loses. We have to go to foreclosure and may be liable for the balance of our loan, which is a scary, scary big number. Our realtor who has been busting her ass to get this sale approved for over ten months wouldn't get paid. And the buyers, who have been patiently waiting to move into their new summer home for ten months would be back to square one with their house hunt. Even the asshole bank would be taking less due to the fact our house would not bring in as much at auction as the buyers are willing to pay.

Not that I care about them.

So really, we are stuck. Moral conscience fighting with reality.

We asked if they would accept $5000 and have yet to hear back (Yet another of my pet peeves about this whole process. They ask us for something and we have no time to respond but yet they can drag their sweet old time out doing things.) Five thousand seemed a bit easier for us to swallow. I hope they say yes because we would finally be done with this horrible situation. If they don't Charming and I will have to sit down and do some serious figuring and cutting. We are pretty bare bones as it is but some things will have to go in order to pay for this. Because it is looking more and more like walking away at this point would hurt too many people.

And I can't handle that hanging over my head.

Being an adult sucks. Big time.

The One With The Plans

We have a lot of things going on right now. We are still getting settled into our new house. Still trying to short sale the old one. We are adjusting to Charming's lovely new work schedule when he doesn't get home until right before the sun peeks over the horizon. We are trying to find a way to pay for all the bills that keep popping up here and there (who knew knee surgeries were so expensive??) But most importantly, we are planning for our vacation.

That's right. Soon we will be without care or worries, living it up and drinking to our new found freedom. No uptight co-workers telling us how to do our jobs. No banks dragging their feet and refusing to realize the dire state of our finances. No paving trucks outside our window waking us up three hours after my husband gets home from work.

At least I hope we can relax. Since we have to keep calling dumbass WF twice a week to keep up on the progress of our file so they don't try to slip something past us again and then deny us for not contacting them. And I'm sure work will find a way to wiggle it's way into our fun since I expect to be called regarding working overtime when I get back. And with our luck there will be construction work going on outside the home we are staying at.

Because that's how things happen for us. Like waking up today with a mile long list of things to do before we leave and discovering the battery in Charming's brand-new Ford Mustang is completely dead and we can't get the car out of the garage because we can't get it out of park and my car won't fit in the garage next to his, at least not enough that he could get into to it to start it once the jumper cables are attached so we had to call AAA and get them to jump him with a portable jumper set and did I mention I got my period which was really not wanted because I didn't want to deal with that on vacation and more importantly it means I once again am not pregnant this month, but at least now I can drink while taking time off and try to forget that our life is currently in shambles.

Here's hoping we don't screw up our vacation as bad as things are in our "real" world.

We could use the break.


P.S. When I get back I have to seriously figure out how to increase the readership here. I lost everyone with my move. :(