The One With The Challenge: What's In My Purse

I have one of those purses that holds everything. Charming jokes that I am going to be one of those moms that has an answer to everything hidden in the depths of my bag. Over the years, my bags have gotten bigger and bigger, rising to the occasion to hold all of my stuff. Luckily for me, big purses are in. I had supreme difficulty when those tiny bags were all the rage.

Charming may tease me about my large purse, but he is quick to ask me to hold things for him, knowing that I have room. Or need something that I just happen to have in my bag. So to compensate for the teasing I make him hold my purse when I need to take a break. He looks so sporty with my purple leather satchel on his shoulder I probably make him hold more than I should.

I feel naked without my bag. When I only take my ID and some cash in my pocket I always feel like I am forgetting something and usually end up frantically looking for the purse I have left safely stowed away in my trunk. I also have several different bags, but all have the same similar qualities. Pockets outside and inside are a must. When we moved I donated about a dozen bags and still have a good number left. I won't say how many because I do not need more ridicule from my husband who insists that I don't need so many different handbags. Trying to explain the necessity of different bags to go with different outfits is like trying to get him to understand why I need four different black pairs of shoes. They are all just different enough in their own way to justify having them all.

Explaining everything in my bag would take forever, so I'll just compile a list. I am sure some of the items will seem odd to you, but I assure you that I have used each and every thing at least once.

The contents are as follows:
~Cell Phone (when it is not in pocket)
~Car Keys (bulky enough on their own with my pink canister of pepper spray attached)
~Wallet (filled with ID, insurance cards, store discount cards, bank card, credit card, pictures, random receipts, the memorial card from my FIL's service, a few lucky charms and other odds and ends that fill the packed sleeves.)
~My iPod, in it's monkey case, with marshmallow headphones
~Blistex (the light blue one, my favorite)
~Sparkling Lip Gloss (for shine)
~Burt Bee's Lip Shimmer (for, well shimmer)
~small Johnson's baby lotion (swiped form my grandfather's hospital room)
~small Advil bottle filled with Advil and Tylenol
~2 hair ties (I am always losing them)
~3 pens (I'm always losing them too)
~Travel pack of Kleenex
~Wrigley's Spearmint gum
~Trident Strawberry Mist gum
~Orbit Cool Mint gum (wow, I have a lot of gum)
~Black leather case with out-of-date business cards in it (my company refuses to give us new ones with our new company name and email address on them. Makes leaving my card oh so easy now...after I write in all the changes)
~Mini calculator
~Hand jizz (or as people usually call it, Hand Sanitizer. We just gave it a snazzier name)
~Two-year mini calendar/date book
~Small notebook with pen that I use to jot down things I need to remember or buy etc...
~Clip on sunglasses for my glasses (Yup, I'm classy)

Then I have two pouches in my purse which are also crammed with stuff:

Pouch 1 has: my inhaler, an emery board, a plastic container filled with Tums, a plastic container filled with 800mg Ibuprofen (I am my co-workers best friend when it comes to drugs), Tide-to-Go pen (saved my life and the lives of others many a times) and extra pads for that time for the month.

Pouch 2 has: a compact mirror, tweezers, nail clippers, a fold up tooth brush, concealer (that I have to replace actually), and warm vanilla sugar body spray from Bath & Body Works. This is my oh-God-I-got-invited-out-I-have-to-fix-myself-pouch. Occasionally there is also a lipstick and powder int here as well.

If this post had been last week we could have added a camera, two pairs of glasses in their cases, sunglasses, a brochure from a wax place, dozens of receipts, a book and a granola bar. That's my vacation stash, varied for what we do each day.

So it's a lot of stuff. But hey, I'm your girl when someone says "Does anyone have a..." Usually I can help!

Plus, I would be great in the audience of Let's Make a Deal.